Yee Haw!
Wednesday, Apr. 24, 2002 05:22

So, I woke up about hmm, 40 minutes ago with this hideous pain in my abdomen, as well as having to urinate. Soo, I got up, went to the bathroom, and the pain is just beginning to dissipate to the point where I will be able to sleep very soon. Yeah, this sucks. I think it's just the gas from hell. But did it have to come tonight? A night where I stayed up way too late anyway? Ugh! I hate missing out on sleep because my body feels like being a complete asshole.

We watched Mullholland Drive tonight. It was supposed to remind me of someone. It didn't, and I'm not sure why it would have except for the two girls getting it on. And that wouldn't be person specific. I gotta say though, I'm not in a good frame of mind for movies like that lately. They make me pretty darn lonely. And in fact, for a while, I pondered making this entry somewhat like that last one, talking about an experience I had in Back Cove. Mmmm, yeah.

I like reflecting on this stuff. It makes me feel less lonely in that it reminds me that I, too, have had "romantic" experiencesl But, at the same time, it makes me feel worse because those days are long gone now. And my memories are limited. I try to sop myself from having thoughts such as these about Noah, since I'd rather not remind myself that even when I was feeling something, he most likely was not.

Back Cove was good though. It was kind of like validation. It was like...hmm...if she'll kiss me in public, then maybe she's happy to be kissing me. Maybe it means more, because she's not ashamed of it. Maybe it's not something that just happens in the quiet of her bedroom. It was dark. We were in the "gayest city in Maine," as we kept pointing out naively. It was a beautiful setting. And I remember not wanting to stop kissing her. People would walk past and we stop for a minute, not wanting to be seen, harassed....or whatevere-d. But I remember putting my hand on her face and turning it back towards me to kiss her, because I couldn't wait for the people to walk by. It was a tease.

I remember her commenting on the fact that I like to kiss. Yeah, I do. A lot. So...when was the last time I kissed anyone? Oh...Thanksgiving. Yeah. It was her then too. It's always been her. And soo good. (when she wasn't bruising the hell out of my lip, that is)

Yeah, so I want to be one of the lovely ladies in Mullholland Drive...or at least I would want to be, but uh, there's some weird stuff going on in that movie concerning identities and stuff.

Okay. I'm ready to go back to bed, where I can hopefully get almost another 3 hours of sleep before I have to get up and go to class. Today's going to have to be carefully planned out in order to fully utilize my time and get everything done that I want to get done. And in the end, I'd like to watch Mullholland Drive again. But that is a purely "if time permits" thing. We'll see how good I am at getting everything else out of the way....mmmm

Until then...here are my song picks for the moment:

"Motorcycle Drive By" Third Eye Blind

"Colorful" The Verve Pipe

"You Had Time" Ani Difranco

"Dilate" Ani Difranco ("When I say you sucked my brain out, the English translation is I am in love with you...")

"At the Stars" Better than Ezra

"Your Body is a Wonderland" John Mayer

"King of Pain" Sung by Alanis